In the game of trafficking, who are the key players, what are the recruitment tactics that traffickers often use, and how can we end the game?

Through a real-life look at trafficking, Jen Campbell (formerly Jen Robinson) outlines the inner workings and common misconceptions through the story of one brave survivor. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community.

[Music] [Applause]

“My only skill is sex. My only skill is sex.”

At least, that's what she believed to be true.

I don't know the picture you have formed in your mind, but it probably isn't of the precious 16-year-old I envision standing in front of me, truly believing that she wasn't worth re-enrolling back into public school because sex was all she was ever going to be good for.

Picture yourself in middle school, still navigating who you are and your place in this world. Your peers are your everything. Their opinions mean more to you than your own.

A friend tells you that you need to be on social media, so you go home and create your first profile that night. You're adding everyone you know, plus their friends. You hope they like you back.

While scrolling through profiles, you spot an older girl who has over 500 likes on one of her pictures. To you, she seems to have it all together: nice clothes, tons of friends, and always being invited to parties.

You wonder if she will like you, so you like her photo, and then she adds you as a friend.

Little do you know, this is what she lives for: preying on younger girls looking to belong.

After weeks of talking to her on social media, she invites you to a party. Do you go? If you say no, you're out of the game. But you answer yes, so you're still in it.

The night of the party, she picks you up in her car and drives you to the store to pick out a few outfits. After, you head back to her apartment, where she hangs up your new clothes in her closet and says, “Soon, this closet will be full of your clothes.”

This means the world to you, as you are living with your grandmother, fighting to make ends meet. It's straight out of a fairy tale.

You hang out with your new friends every weekend for two months, feeling like you finally found a place where you belong.

But then she sits you down. She tells you that, in order to stay, you have to make money. She tells you that her older sister will be taking pictures of you to show the men what they'll be getting.

She hands you a condom and drops you off at your first date's house, before you even realize the full impact of what is unfolding. Your gut tells you to run. But you don't. You know if you leave, you'll lose everything.

You remain frozen.

Before you even realize what's happened, five men have bought you that first night.

That is one of many real-life stories of how subtle the trafficking of our youth takes place.

In my community, trafficking is not about being kidnapped or taken overseas. It's a slow process of recruitment and manipulation. Pimps and traffickers know how to see a need and fill it.

I once heard a trafficker say that his only job is to figure out a girl's weakness. And everyone has one. It doesn't matter what it is; he has or can be the solution.

If she needs a father figure, done. He can be her protector.

If she needs money? Easy. He can be her provider.

The new iPhone, and her parents won't buy it for her? She's worth making the investment.

This trafficker stated that he's not just looking for runaways and vulnerable girls. He will recruit anyone: boys and girls.

I have been in the anti-trafficking movement for almost 10 years, with my recent focus shifting from adults to girls under the age of 18.

They're incredible. They're funny, resilient, and full of life. The youngest girl that I have worked with is just 11 years old.

They come from every background: two-parent homes, single-parent homes, foster care, and runaway.

I have seen the shift in their recruitment move from malls and bus stops to almost entirely online.

Millions of strangers can effortlessly start a relationship with your child. It's as easy as them liking a photo, stopping to ask how your child's day is, or telling them that they look nice.

And we continue to make it even easier as we live in an age where relationships often start through a screen, and we forget what real, meaningful connection looks like.

It's called “the game” because that is what it is to the trafficker.

In this game, you change your name and lie about your age. You are repeatedly raped, threatened, and beaten for not bringing home enough money. You compete for attention while having sex with multiple strangers every night. You're arrested again.

Imagine experiencing this at one point in your life. And now picture yourself experiencing all of this at 13 years old.

After your last date of the night, you return home and wake up in time to catch the bus to school.

In this game, there are three key players: the trafficker, the victim, and the buyer. Each has a defined role. But remove just one, and the game ends.

That one is the buyer.

The buyers' entitlement to sex fuels this entire operation. In the business model of trafficking, the buyer is the demand.

I live in Nevada, a sex tourism state, where there is no shortage of buyers. In the world of trafficking, when the demand increases, the supply follows.

For this reason, traffickers love to come to my state. When the demand for sex is high, no child is safe.

To further elaborate, I have worked with a victim of trafficking out of every single one of our high schools and the majority of our middle schools.

These girls are often still in school and go home to their families each night. There's a perception of freedom—that they can come and go as they please.

But what most don't realize is the mental bondage are their invisible chains.

The very answer to the question “Why don't they just leave their trafficker?"

Being exploited night after night rewires your brain, creating a trauma bond to your trafficker.

Simply put, a trauma bond is a strong bond that forms and is strengthened by ongoing cycles of abuse, followed by the illusion of love and reward.

Victims cannot just cut these ties to their trafficker without first establishing new and healthy connections to take their place.

Recall the scenario: the same girl who was recruited off social media is the same girl who, at 16, believed her only skill was sex.

Her name is Shay.

Shay is the most vibrant and lively person I have ever met. She's an eternal optimist, which is what made her the perfect target.

Shay's trafficker was a woman. She didn't need to pretend to be something or someone other than who she was because she was offering the one thing we all desire, and that is to be seen, heard, and loved.

Shay's trafficker was someone she thought was her friend.

I asked one of the 13-year-old girls we work with what she likes most about her trafficker. She replied, “He gives me a place to stay and good food to eat.”

When I asked what the good food was, she replied, “Ramen." Ten-cent soup.

That's the bar we need to meet.

We must do better than the traffickers.

People always want to know what they can do to be a part of the solution. Most envision their part as something heroic: stopping the trafficker and rescuing the girl.

It's not. It's much simpler than that.

Put away your phones. Look each other in the eye and start spending time together. Invest in the future generation. Model to our youth what healthy relationships look like, the good and the bad.

If we don't take time to stop and listen, a trafficker will, and we will continue to lose the game.

Before you leave here today, think about your one: the one young person in your life that needs extra support.

Where could intervention happen?

For Shay? Her mom died of breast cancer when she was nine, and her dad was never in the picture. She started cutting her wrists at age 10 as an expression of her pain.

Did anyone stop and see the sad and hurt little girl behind the mask that often paraded itself like laughter and rebellion?

Start asking open-ended questions.

If you're a parent, don't worry about invading your child's privacy, especially online. Privacy is exactly where the traffickers hide.

Kids are good at keeping secrets, but I believe even more, they want to be heard, especially by a trusted adult.

The same proves true for adults. It just takes asking the right questions and providing the space and time for them to talk.

A study conducted by Shared Hope International shows that 40% of the buyers of children are adults in positions of authority and trust: police officers, firefighters, teachers.

Trafficking ends when we, and more specifically men, quit buying women and children.

Shay is now 21. She's been in and out of the game for seven years.

She is my one, and a representation of every one. She is the one I will never quit fighting for, the one I know will have a greater voice and impact than I could ever.

But we all have a role to play.

I don't know about you, but we are not okay with a single 16-year-old growing up believing that her only skill is sex.

[Applause]

My name is Shay, and I am the one. Who is your one?

[Applause]

About Jen Campbell

Jen holds a Master of Business Administration from the University of Nevada, Reno. She and Melissa Holland co-founded Awaken in 2011. Jen is currently co-chairperson of the Prevention committee on the State of Nevada’s Commercial Sexual Exploitation of Children Coalition.

Jen enjoys building strong, trust-filled relationships with the women and children Awaken serves. She is dedicated and passionate, and truly believes she will see commercial sexual exploitation and sex trafficking eradicated in northern Nevada and around the world.